with apologies to Elizabeth Barrett Browning
How do I hate thee, scientific notation in Word?
Let me count the ways.
I hate thee to the depth and breadth and height
My hands can reach, while making a strangling motion toward your programmer.
I hate thee to the level of vision I have lost
Squinting at the incredibly small text you create.
I hate thee freely, as I strive to format you;
I hate thee purely, as one keystroke changes my font.
I hate thee with the passion put to use
In my old griefs, and with my childhood’s faith.
I hate thee with a hate I once reserved for
People who leave shopping carts in the middle of close parking spaces at the grocery.
Tears, Disappointment, Frustration, of all my life!
And, if God choose,
I shall hate thee even more after death.
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